You are viewing [info]a_s_fan's journal

a_s_fan [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
a_s_fan

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Fall out Boy [Jun. 5th, 2006|12:36 am]
[mood |depresseddepressed]

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope, he is a gentleman..
And maybe he won't find out what I know:
You were the last good thing about this part of town..

When I wake up..
I'm willing to take my chances on
the hope i forget,
that you hate him more than you notice
I wrote this for you (for you, So)

you need him .. I could be him
I could be an accident but I'm still tryin'
And that's more than I can say for him

Where Is your boy tonight?
I hope, he is a gentleman..
And maybe he won't find out what I know:
You were the last good thing about this part of town

Someday I'll appreciate in value
Get off my ass and call you
In the mean time I'll sport my brand new fashion
Of waking up with pants on at four in the afternoon

D'you need him .. I should be him
I could be an accident but I'm still tryin'
And that's more than I can say for him

(ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR!)

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman
and maybe he won't find out what I know,
You were the last good thing about this part of town

(Won't find out ... He wont find out ...)

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman..
Maybe he wont find out what I know:
you were the last good thing about this part of town..

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman
Maybe he wont find out what I know:
you were the last good thing about this part of town..
linkpost comment

::sign:: [Jun. 3rd, 2006|11:17 pm]
[mood |depresseddepressed]

I don't know how to say how I feel, but it isn't good. The littlest things to set me off. Then my mind feels up with all this shit. Now all I need is a friend and I either don';t want to bother anyone, they are busy, or they don't want to hang out.

I don't know what it is. I just want to know what is wrong with me that I can't keep a friend for more then a couple months.
linkpost comment

stuff [Jun. 3rd, 2006|11:12 pm]
[mood |depresseddepressed]

:sigh:: Once again I am failed by my own gender the cheating the hatred the pain. Maybe I was wrong maybe being a man makes you an asshole. Maybe it is just the youth of the world. the immaturity.

I know I don't just want booty.



You know I just want someone who likes me like I like them, who is there for me, who I could be there for. Now, I fear, it is not the time for most girls my age to be in a serious relationship. They either are not ready emotionally or they not mature enough relationship to make the best decisions in a relationship. Not that guys are any better. Actually it is there fault for the misdirection of young women.

Men in my age group are the greatest communicator in the and neither are the women, but men have an even more serious problem. This tend to lead guy who want more of a physical relationship to mislead women in their intentions. Yes a lot of men are asshole or at least seem like it, but then there are the few that really do give a fuck and this is time in which they are put on the back burner.

This may make them mad or angry, but sooner or later they realize. It isn't something wrong with them, but with society in general. This will all make sense in a quite a few years when all of us are a little older and wiser. A lot of guys I know will notice for their greatness as a friend and much more.

Now don't take me for an arrogant solipsistic prick. I am far from perfect and a little unstable, but their are many out there that are respectful, truthful, stable, smart, and all those things that make someone who a person would be comfortable with. Both men and women.

Yeah I may write these things a lot lately and they may change quite a bit from each other, but each breathe I take I learn more. I have realized I was not the man I always thought I was. What others thought I was. As I look back I see my mistakes and I fear what I have done. To others I was the cute guy the quiet one. I would never do anything wrong. Would I? No one ever said the thing I did were wrong, but I know.

HAHA, it always comes back to me. What so important about me that I keep coming back. I feel solipsistic, self centered all that crazy shit. Why isn't it ever about anyone else. ::sigh::




All the thoughts spinning spinning
A world pool in my mind
How I make it stop I don't know
Like a spin cycle on high
I can't make out what it what

I feel the cold steel circle touching my head
My veins pulsate with adrenaline
The fear Deeper then any other I have known
Not of someone or something, but of me
The thing I fear the most is me

The thoughts that don't stop
The constant treat of cold steel in my hand
As try to justify pain
I try to talk my self down
More pain more thoughts

One twitch it's done
The pain will make it all go away
Then flashes of those I love
My friend my family
The pain slips from me and falls to the floor

Warm salty tears roll down to my lips
What is wrong
It hurts too much to stay yet just as much to go
Why can't I just be no where
Some place where nothing matters, but nothing

Make the thoughts stop
Make the pain go away
Help me not to fear the one thing I shouldn't fear
Help me to breathe easy once again
Please Comfort me


Have you ever wished there was a switch to turn of the brain. So that you can sleep or even so you can get through a moment with out wanting to beat your head into a wall till the thoughts stopped. I fear nothing, but that which I can control.

Currently listening:
The Dark Side of the Moon
By Pink Floyd
Release date: By 25 October, 1990
linkpost comment

The boringness of today [May. 18th, 2006|09:30 pm]
[mood |aggravatedaggravated]
[music |Minority, Green Day]

Know what I did today. I slept and played guitar thats it. I need to get a life. grrrr
linkpost comment

Oh shit [May. 17th, 2006|10:55 am]
[mood |aggravatedaggravated]
[music |Minority, Green Day]

My dad. Grrrr. He thinks he knows me. He wants to believe that he knows more about me then people I actually talk to. What do I do he wont help me follow his path yet he wont let me follow my own and now I am stuck back where I started.
linkpost comment

UMM [May. 15th, 2006|08:04 pm]
[Current Location |Home]

I didn't know I had a live journal.
link1 comment|post comment

(no subject) [Oct. 11th, 2004|10:04 pm]
I doubt I will be posting here much but it makes it easier to keep track of those evil people who swiched
link2 comments|post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]